Meeting the parents is an issue that many have conflicting opinions on. Some feel like it’s a big deal while others don’t. For me, it’s a big deal. I will never be comfortable with meeting someone’s parents after dating for a few months, let alone on the first date. That’s a milestone in a relationship and it should be done when the time is right.
I have only met one of my ex’s parents and that may be where my trauma for meeting my boyfriend’s parents comes from. His parents were really nice. However, they didn’t seem to think that I was serious about the relationship since I was significantly younger than their son. They kept asking me about my plans for the future even though I had just joined university. The relationship ended shortly after that since I felt like I was wasting his time.
Fast forward to 10 years later and I’m all grown up with a good job and a bright future. The only problem I have is that I can’t seem to meet a good guy who meets my standards. I have sort of put my search for Mr Right on hold for now and I’m currently just dating for fun. This has, in turn, exposed me to many peculiar characters such as Jack.
Like many guys I’ve dated in the recent past, I didn’t see a future with him. He was simply supposed to be a guy I spent time with, went on cute dates with, told him about my day and made life a bit less stressful. However, Jack had other plans.
We met online and I had clearly stated that I wasn’t looking for anything serious. I even explained to him before we met that I wanted a casual relationship.
“Why don’t you want a serious relationship?” He asked.
“I have a very busy life right now and I don’t think I can fully commit myself to a relationship.”
“I think I can change your mind. I’ll even get you to meet my parents.”
I brushed off his comment thinking that he was joking. However, I was about to find out how serious he was.
We planned to meet for dinner the following day after matching online. It was a bit fast but I didn’t have any plans for that weekend so I went along with the plan.
Jack seemed like an impatient person. As soon as we met, he was already holding my hands and telling me how beautiful I was.
“You’re even more beautiful in person.” He said.
“Thanks,” I replied.
“I really like you.”
“Really? We don’t even know each other.”
“I don’t need to know you to know that I like you. I can tell you’re a good person.”
“Okay.”
I was already feeling uncomfortable but I chose to stay because I didn’t want to upset him. He then started talking about his parents and how they wanted to meet his girlfriend.
“My parents would love you. You should meet them. They don’t live far from here” He suggested.
“I don’t think I can meet them tonight.”
“Why not? It won’t take long.”
“That’s not the issue. It’s just too soon to meet your parents.”
“No, it’s not. They’ll love you, I promise.” He insisted.
“I don’t want to meet your parents,” I answered, slightly irritated.
After seeing my reaction, he stopped asking if I wanted to meet his parents and we had a fairly normal conversation.
When he wasn’t pushing me to meet his parents, Jack was actually an interesting conversationalist. He had vast knowledge on a lot of topics and he was a pretty good narrator. I didn’t mind listening to him the whole night as long as he didn’t bring up his parents which he didn’t.
We left the restaurant around 11 pm and he offered to drop me off at my place because he didn’t want me to take an Uber that late.
The drive was quick and uneventful. We didn’t talk much since I was quite tipsy and wanted to get home so I could sleep. He walked me to my apartment even though I assured him that I was okay.
“I can’t let you walk by yourself in this state.” He said.
Once we got to my apartment door, I tried to get him to leave but he wasn’t getting the hint.
“I’m so tired. I just want to sleep.”
“Me too.” He said.
“Okay. Goodnight.”
“Oh. Okay. Are you sure you don’t want to meet my parents?” He asked.
“Yes, I am.”
“We have a family event tomorrow. I can come and pick you up if you want.”
“I won’t be around.”
“Then let’s go and meet them right now.”
“I’m not even in the right state of meeting them.”
“They won’t mind. They’re very easygoing.”
“No. I don’t want to meet your parents tonight or ever.” I said firmly which finally got my point across.
“Okay. Goodnight.” He said then left.
I had to confirm whether he had left before I unlocked my apartment door because I thought he would come back and force his way inside.
The night was peaceful but I was woken up by loud banging early in the morning. The banging persisted for a few minutes before hearing a familiar voice calling my name.
“Sasha! Sasha!”
It was Jack. I knew if I came out I wouldn’t be able to get rid of him so I waited until he got tired and left on his own but he didn’t. He kept knocking for nearly 30 minutes before one of my neighbours came out and told him to stop.
“She’s not around.” He said.
“Where is she?”
“I don’t know but you need to leave. You’re disturbing the rest of us.”
Jack resisted but after more people came out, he left. He then sent me a text calling me the B-word and telling me that his parents don’t like arrogant girls. I didn’t care about the insults. I was just happy that he had left me alone and that I wouldn’t be seeing him again.
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